Renowned media personality Unathi Nkanyi recently opened up on “Podcast and Chill” about several matters, including her career change and failed marriage.
She explained to co-hosts MacG and Sol Phenduka that she decided to stop making house music, which earned her widespread acclaim, after a chat with her ex-husband and musician, Thomas Msengana, who is best known as Bad Boy T.
“The reason why I stopped making house music, the songs you were listening to before we started, was because he came home to me the one day and was like ‘yo, if we want to survive, I'll stop playing in clubs and you need to stop making music that makes you have to perform in clubs’ and that's when I stopped making house music and that's why I make the music that I do today,” the musician and former “Idols SA” judge said.
The couple, who married in 2009, divorced in 2017. They have two children together.
The “Nguwe” hitmaker revealed that she had tried “everything” to save her marriage. “In 2014, we had a family meeting, all the elders were flown in from all over the country.”
Nkanyi added that infidelity was not the reason for their split.
“We grew up, we grew apart, like dreams change, I am a different woman today then I was in 2014, then I was in 2004, it's just how life happens.”
Following her divorce, she admitted that she went through a “phase”, which saw her being in open relationships. “Entitlement is not always a bad thing, most of the time it is but it's not always,” she said.
“If I'm with you, you’re entitled to me not disrespecting you, you’re entitled to me being faithful if we decide to be faithful or if we say that we’re in an open relationship, we need to know what the rules are. Those are entitlements. You have to be open to that.”
She added: “I've been in open relationships. Guys, I have been divorced for seven years, like c’mon. You’re just honest with each other. People do catch feelings but you have to be honest.”
She added: “For a very long time I had issues obviously coming out of marriage so I didn't want to commit. I still had to heal, I still had to go through so much.
“So for me, it's always fine, like okay, I'm okay with it, until they’re not … so for me its always been the guy that's like, ‘Yo I don't want to share you no more’, then I’m on some damn right and then yeah, I stop seeing other people, he stops seeing other people and then we become exclusive.”
Nkanyi said she was faithful during her marriage.
“I was faithful for 14 years, like I didn't look another way, I didn’t answer messages that were inappropriate, so it's that phase that you’re in and you've got to commit to that phase and you’re entitled to want your man to be faithful, until it's otherwise.”
Nkanyi also believes in being mature when it comes to relationships.
“Ghosting is very immature guys, no you talk, guys we are in our 40s so there so much you can communicate that doesn't have to be awkward.”
“You say, ‘yo man, we can't do this anymore, okay, sharp’, or ‘yo man, i don't want to share you anymore’, sharp.”
“You always catch feelings, that's what I’m saying, people lie if they say there are no strings attached, you do catch feelings, you must just manage your feelings.”
“Especially women, because we receive, we give ourselves to you so its a very emotional thing.”
Watch the full podcast here: