The slight redhead pulling pints in the George Hotel in Eshowe might seem an incongruous “poster girl for peace,” but then she would be the first to point out that preconceptions are often way off the beaten track.
Sonja Kruse, 35, is moon-lighting as a barmaid in the historic hostelry while she collates the contents of five notebooks filled with her minute handwriting, 400 voice recordings, and more than 14 000 photographs to create a book that will be her thank you to South Africans for reaffirming her belief that “I am because you are”.
In December Kruse arrived back in Eshowe on foot during a rainstorm, bedraggled but euphoric, after a year spent on the road, relying on strangers to keep her safe, sheltered and fed.
She covered all nine provinces and shared the customs and rituals of 16 cultures. She is one of a fortunate few who will never bemoan not having the courage to take the road less travelled.
Chatting after her shift is over, Kruse’s expressive eyes blaze and her hands gesture eloquently as she shares special experiences from her trip. Locals propping up the bar eye her with affection. They are obviously proud of their very own “Ubuntu Girl,” as she has become known.
The intrepid traveller says she has found her perfect fit in a town where being left of centre, or even downright batty, is the norm.
“It’s a town of natural eccentrics,” she says; “the kind of small town where people might gossip but if you experience any kind of hardship those same people will be in and out of your house constantly, bringing meals, smiles and words of encouragement.
“We take each other as we are. Here it’s about breaking the code. Even if you have money you walk about barefoot.”
Artist Peter Engblom, another Eshowe oddity, is acting as a sounding-board for Kruse while she drafts her travelogue-cum-love-story of South Africans united. The dreamer and the bad boy known for his exquisite but risqué work will no doubt prove an unbeatable combination.
“I’ve always been a dreamer,” she said. “This idea made all my other dreams make sense.”
The dream to beat all others entailed bundling a couple of basics in a backpack, along with her trusty Canon 350D single reflex camera and a R100 note, and taking to the road without any idea what nightfall might bring. And repeating the exercise day after day, month after month, as she worked her way through cities and dorpies, finding generosity in South African hearts.
“It was to be a human trip, not a physical conquest expedition,” she explained. “I was determined to find good news stories by asking for everything I needed, in the anticipation and belief that I would receive it.”
In November 2009, Kruse dropped her bombshell to her family just after celebrating her sister’s wedding at Port St Johns.
“I know we’re all susceptible to others’ opinions and I didn’t want people trying to talk me out of it, so I didn’t give my friends and family much notice of my intentions. I had quit my job at a safari lodge and given away my car to disconnect me from materialism. I left behind the last of my sense of control and security and took off from East London.”
The first lift she got was from members of the SAP, and Kruse spent the first night of her adventure in an East London township.
“I had been chatting to people at taxi ranks and met a lovely woman, a domestic worker, Nomi, who invited me to her madam’s house, sat me down in the kitchen and poured me tea, and then begged me to change my mind.
“It’s too dangerous,” she kept repeating. “When she saw I wasn’t going to back down, she rode with me in a taxi to the township.
Later she confessed she had every intention of getting the taxi driver to take me back home.
“You go and talk to the people,” she said, not expecting me to find any takers. A mom with two children who rented a room in someone else’s house took me in. She made a bed for herself on the floor and I got to share her bed with the two small children. There can be no bigger honour bestowed on a guest.”
Kruse said that as she took her first step away from the known, she felt the story for a book.
“Not a book per se, but the story of an experience. I was so saddened by how we perceive our country. It was time for someone to do this, to inject something positive into all those negative dinner table conversations going on.
“The only plan I had was to travel in a clockwork direction and visit all nine provinces.”
Conceding that there were times she felt vulnerable, Kruse said fear was not an indulgence she entertained.
“Life with fear equals death. When the going was tough I would just have a lekker chat to myself. I got a ride with a truck driver who started getting over-friendly and said he wanted to marry me. I just leaned over, touched his arm gently and said: ‘This journey is not about you or me. It’s about our country. These stories are in my hands.’ The message was translated easily.”
The people who gave her lifts and hosted her in their homes were often incredulous when they learned of her mission.
“Many people said: ‘Jislaaik, you must be a foreigner’. So many live a shackled lifestyle. They’d say things like: ‘If I didn’t have the house, I’d love to do something like this.’
The vast majority of those who shared their homes and meals with her were on or below the breadline, Kruse said. That made their welcome all the more meaningful.
Kruse said she never went hungry; quite the contrary.
“I picked up weight and couldn’t fit into my jeans, so I was grateful I had a sarong.”
A question many women readers might ask is how she coped at “that” time of month.
“Even there, my hosts were incredible,” she said. “Without making an issue of it they would say things like: ‘I’m just popping out for some groceries. Please put anything you need on the list.’ Others would slip a few toiletries in my backpack when I left. I always had whatever I needed.”
Although it was the goodness in people’s hearts she was seeking, Kruse found she had some lessons to absorb when it came to receiving.
“I didn’t expect to learn, when an 11-year-old with tears in her eyes offered me a gift of R10, that you must never reject an act of kindness,” she said.
Initially the trip was going to be six months long, said Kruse, but her innate stubbornness caused her to double it.
“When I announced my plans, a friend commented: ‘I guess anyone can do anything for six months,’ which really galvanised me.
“I thought I’d come back and be clever. I only learned how much we have to learn. When you relinquish control in favour of experiencing the moment, great things happen.
“I interacted with Christians, Muslims, Wiccans, Sai Baba devotees and Rastafarians. We exchanged views and had long debates, but they unfailingly treated me with respect. Humanity or ubuntu was the common thread. If we acknowledge how far we have come, we can teach the world how to embrace diversity.”
She lists some of the many experiences that have left an indelible impression:
“Sixteen-year-old Anushka van der Merwe of Mashinga (formerly Lydenburg) in Mpumalanga presented me with a special good luck crystal and then made me a hand-stitched velvet bag for it.
“Riding in taxis… there is always space for another passenger. Taxis to me, at least inside, are the embodiment of ubuntu. Walking along a dusty road in the Cedarberg Mountains in the heat of the day and being able to embrace the moment, not the heat. Sleeping in a cave. Visiting Orania because Portia Mahange reminded me to keep an open mind. Staying in Ventersdorp township after Eugene Terre’Blanche was killed.
“Re-learning how to knit with the gogos in Sabie township and watching them play soccer to lower their cholesterol and blood pressure.
“Entering KZN along the dusty roads in the hills between Wakkerstroom and Utrecht. Not only the last province, but the province of my heart.
“Becoming an honorary member of the Pillay family in Verulam. My name is Sarnia Pillay now.”
Kruse’s blog entry for Tuesday, December 28, written shortly after her adventure ended, read: “If following one’s dream makes one feel this alive, may I never be roused again.” Almost inevitably, a sense of anticlimax followed.
“I found myself missing all the wonderful people I had met. Just as they left a part of themselves in my heart, there were parts of me that continued living all over.
“Being 150 families richer in 114 towns across this magnificent country in effect meant it cost me R100 to buy ‘timeshare’ for holidays for the rest of my life. Clever, huh?”
Her journey has provoked a lot of interest and Kruse is often asked to lecture on her experiences. She has also attracted an avid following on the internet.
“Someone asked me whether I would recommend that others do the ubuntu journey, and 20-year-old James Lawrenson from Durban came to my rescue with this answer: ‘You can’t hitchhike in someone else’s dream.’”
• Visit Kruse’s website at www.theubuntugirl.co.za - Sunday Tribune